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What’s Real Anyway?

In the middle of practicing being in present with strangers at Randusari waterfall, the mind distracted her away. She slowly rubbed one cheek with the palm of her hand and asked a question to herself, “What’s real anyway?”
Her mind wandered to a stranger she met in Ubud 4 years ago.

The stranger told her that it’s all in her. 

She didn’t get it before. 
For years she had kept asking the universe for the truth. All the things she has had -people, moments, and experiences- somehow brought her closer; Consciousness is real. The only real thing perhaps.
She even stays to walk on the path up to now. Because by only knowing will not make her complete. She gotta feel her love existence as a whole; The love that loves the love itself. That’s why no matter how much suffer she is, she keeps practicing to be fully aware of being until the end of her.
It’s all in you. She will never forget those stranger’s eyes. 
The ring bells. She comes back from the depth darkness of the mind-well. She is being grateful to the waterfall for whatever it has brought for her this afternoon.
It’s all in you.


Aku Berbicara Dengan Kemaluanku

Malam ini aku berbicara dengan kemaluanku setelah dibawa ombak kenangan pada kemaluan perempuan-perempuan yang pernah ditemui.

Adalah kata maaf terucap untuk anak yang tak akan pernah keluar dari rahim melaluinya; Keengganan telah lahir dan tumbuh dengan mesra dalam janji untuk diri sendiri.

Hanya agar tak ingin anak itu suatu hari nanti, bertanya-tanya pada semesta dalam sunyi dan tangis yang ia nikmati, tentang perihal “untuk apa aku dilahirkan di dunia ini”.